


clown-to-clown miscommunication

by radioactive_raccoon_hidari



Series: ATLA brain rot [2]
Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Confessions, F/F, Gen, M/M, clown behaviour, idiocy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-12
Updated: 2020-09-12
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:41:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,609
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26422801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/radioactive_raccoon_hidari/pseuds/radioactive_raccoon_hidari
Summary: Sokka: i have once again fallen in love with royaltyKatara: you absolute clownZuko, jumping out of the bushes: don’t touch my fucking sister or so help me agniKatara: YOU ABSOLUTE CLOWN
Relationships: Azula/Mai (Avatar), Sokka/Zuko (Avatar)
Series: ATLA brain rot [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1916578
Comments: 27
Kudos: 524





	clown-to-clown miscommunication

Katara and Aang are visiting the Fire Nation palace for a week, and Zuko knows it’s now or never. 

Sokka is hiding something and he’s about to find out what. 

It has been weeks, if not months, Zuko isn’t too sure as he admits he’s not the most perceptive person and hadn’t picked up on it until recently. His first course of action had been to ask Toph, but she’d simply put her feet up on a table and informed him that she’d been sworn to secrecy, and didn’t say another word on the matter. 

He knew Toph would never break, so he immediately moved on to Mai and Azula, who are often complicit in each other's schemes nowadays and make very good spies. Unfortunately, both girls had shared a glance, rolled their eyes, and in unison, answered, “Not interested.” 

Zuko is on his own now, but he’s not about to give up. He’s more than capable enough to do a little eavesdropping and the occasional bribing of a palace servant for information. Besides, stealth is one of his fortes. 

He knows Sokka will absolutely tell Katara whatever it is the moment they have time alone, and the only places in the palace without the constant presence of servants or guards were the inner chambers of Zuko’s bedroom, or the turtleduck garden. 

Which is why Firelord Zuko has made the executive decision to hide in the bushes of his own gardens and lie in wait on this fine, sunny afternoon. The tricky part had been getting into his hiding spot without alerting any of the turtleducks, who all would’ve swarmed him in delight and immediately blown his cover.

He crouches, stiller than a statue, as Katara and Sokka enter the gardens, already mid-conversation. 

“Are you out of your mind?” Katara hisses, marching past her brother and sitting down by the pond. Zuko knows it calms her to be close to water, however if Katara is mad, it can’t be a good thing.

“I know, I know!” Sokka follows her, kneeling by her side imploringly. “But like… do you think I have a chance?”

Katara looks at him, and her incredulous expression changes to a look of pity reserved for people who are too far gone to be saved. “Sokka, I love you, but you are an absolute clown.”

“But like, how bad could it possibly go if I confessed my feelings?” he sighs, staring across the pond.

Zuko’s eyes widen but he remains silent. _Feelings?_ Oh no. Definitely not one of Zuko’s fortes. _For who?_

Katara throws her hands in the air. “Oh I don’t know, you get thrown in prison? Or burned to a crisp? Or… or Spirits forbid, struck down by lightning!” 

Sokka’s eyes widen in alarm. “You think Azula would?”

Zuko twitches at the mention of his sister’s name, a wave of horrible realization coming upon him.  
  
“Or Mai might stick you full of knives.”  
  
“Actually, I don’t think Mai will be a problem at all.”

“I don’t think the Fire Nation in its entirety would take kindly to anyone trying to get into its royalty’s pants to be honest.”

“Don’t say it like that!” Sokka squeaks. “My feelings are pure! I mean, if it leads to that, I’d be happy but at this point, I just-”

Zuko’s definitely heard enough. He doesn’t want to hear any more about Sokka’s intentions towards his _sister_. He emerges from his hiding place, standing up to his full height, smoothing down his crimson firelord robes, and clears his throat with an obvious air of annoyance. 

Both siblings jump up and turn to stare at him. All the color drains from Sokka’s face as Katara averts her eyes guiltily, looking anywhere but at Zuko’s face. 

Zuko crosses his arms in front of him, although his impressive intimidation loses some of its edge as the turtleducks notice him and begin to gather at his feet. 

“Hi Zuko,” Katara greets him faintly as Sokka looks like he’s about to die on the spot.

Zuko nods at her and takes a deep breath, turning the full force of his golden gaze onto Sokka. 

“Sokka, you are one of my best friends and I respect you,” he begins calmly. “But I swear to Agni, if you touch my sister or in any way interfere with her relationship with Mai, it won’t be fire, lightning, or blades you’ll be met with. I will literally end you with my bare fucking hands.”

Sokka and Katara both look like they’re going through the five stages of grief in a matter of seconds, but Zuko presses on. “If you even make it that far. I know Azula’s become much more calm and… likeable after her rehabilitation, but she is deeply in love with Mai, and if you so much as imply that could change, I don’t think she would hesitate to fry you.”

There’s a moment of silence.

Then Katara starts laughing hysterically. She can’t stop. She clutches her sides, trying to catch her breath as Zuko stares in utter confusion and Sokka buries his head in his hands to hold back a tortured scream. 

“Oh spirits,” she wheezes, wiping tears from her eyes. “I take it back. I take it all back. You’re both absolute clowns. It’s perfect.” 

“Katara,” Sokka groans, sinking to the ground. 

“I guess I’ll let him explain himself,” she says to Zuko. She pats Sokka on the shoulder as she leaves, still giggling. “Good luck.”

Sokka doesn’t move from his crouched position as Katara disappears, and Zuko slowly lowers himself to the ground too, settling in amongst the turtleducks. A few of them poke curiously at Sokka, trying to figure out what the water tribe boy is doing. 

“Okay, what the actual fuck is going on?” Zuko finally asks, letting some turtleducks settle in his lap. 

Sokka puts his palms together under his nose, taking a deep breath. “Why… why the actual fuck do you think I like your sister? Show me the math.”

Zuko blinks at him. “You have a track record for being attracted to women in positions of power.” 

Sokka sighs. “Yeah, I admit that, but this is _Azula_ we’re talking about.”

Zuko frowns in confusion. “So you… don’t like her.” 

Sokka backtracks a little. “No, I mean I don’t _dislike_ her, at least not any more, but no offense, she is a literal mental patient, and I’m honestly still a little scared of her, so no, I’m not… _attracted_ to her, no.” 

“Oh,” Zuko says, still confused. “Then what about your… feelings?”

Sokka looks at him disbelievingly. 

“I could help you, maybe?” Zuko offers. “If it’s not my sister or Mai, why wouldn’t you tell me? I mean, I know I’m not good at feelings and stuff, but you trust me, don’t you? ...It’s not Mai, is it?”

Sokka just continues to stare. “Katara might be right. We’re both clowns.”

“Wha-hey!” 

“Am I gonna have to walk you through it? Besides your sister, what other Fire Nation royalty is there? And if you so much as begin to mention your uncle, I will drown both of us in this pond.”

Sokka watches as Zuko still struggles to put 2 and 2 together like a toddler trying to force a square block through a triangle opening. 

He tries another tactic. “Zuko, I’m bisexual.”

“Oh. Me too.”

“Wait, what?”

“I never really thought about it that much, but then in Ba Sing Se there was this time Jin and Jet both showed up at the tea shop, and--”

“Okay, we’re gonna bookmark _that_ for another time,” Sokka interrupts. “Focus.”

“Right, right, Fire Nation royalty,” Zuko nods, turning back to the task at hand. “What’s like, your cut-off age? Most of the people in our court and council are older than us by… a bit, so I’m wondering if-” 

“It’s you!” Sokka admits defeat, flopping down onto the grass. “It’s you, you absolute clown.”

He stares up at the wide blue sky as turtleducks take the opportunity to clamber onto him. 

“Oh. Are you sure?”

Sokka turns his head to glare at Zuko, who’s staring down at the turtleduck in his lap. “What the fuck do you mean by that?”

“Well, y’know,” Zuko mumbles, stroking a fluffy yellow head. “I’m me. I’m… a clown.” 

Sokka sits up to gaze at him very intently. “Are you trying to tell me… that you… the literal _firelord_ … think that you’re not good enough for _me_?”

Zuko shrugs uncomfortably, his face turning red. “Being the firelord and being a clown aren’t mutually exclusive things.”

Sokka tilts Zuko’s head up with both hands, forcing him to see how serious he is. “Zuko… you have so many brain cells and yet you choose to use absolutely none of them when it comes to me. Why?” 

“I-I don’t know,” Zuko stutters, turning even redder. “You’re… special.” 

There’s a moment of silence as they look at each other, the pieces falling into place bit by bit. 

And then Toph bursts out of a bush on the other side of the turtleduck pond, pumping her fists in the air. 

“CLOWN TO CLOWN COMMUNICATION HAS BEEN ACHIEVED!” she roars in celebration. 

“Toph, what the fuck!” Sokka shouts as Zuko heavily considers passing away.

“I BEEN WAITIN’ FOR THIS ONE!” Toph continues to celebrate, jabbing her fingers in their direction. “AANG OWES ME MONEY!”

“I am _begging_ you to shut up!” Sokka groans. He turns to look at Zuko, who has lain down amongst his turtleducks and has his hands folded atop his chest and eyes closed. “What are you doing?”

“I’ve decided to pass away. Tell Azula she can have the throne.”


End file.
